CineVibez Fanzine #10
Dump Month Delight Vibes
Welcome back to CineVibez Fanzine, where every movie has a vibe - even during dump month. Yes, dump month - the beloved tradition of tossing stinkers in the January abyss, never to see the light of day again. This year is no different, so I included a few wide releases in January to even things out.
Next week, you’ll find new segments on movie guides and awards season, including very exciting news concerning the Third Annual Archie Awards! I can’t believe it’s still going strong, three years later.
Dump Month Disasters
Let’s start with Leigh Whannell’s Wolf Man. Christopher Abbott plays Blake, our titular wolf man, and Julia Garner is his wife, Charlotte - what a nice sounding name. Anyway, before the transformation takes place, we see Blake hunting with his dad by the family cabin. This scene sets the stage for the rest of the film: Not only do we learn lychans exist, but we also witness the trauma his father inflicted. This one had so much potential, but all the good ideas - like the visual transformation and the POV shots - are superficial and half-baked.
Even for CGI, the transformation looks fantastic; like a visual homage to Cronenberg’s The Fly. But Whannell never shows us anything close to Seth Brundel’s mental decline. The POV shots are pretty cool, too. As our wolf man transforms, he recognizes the fear in Charlotte’s eyes but she sounds like a teacher in Peanuts. On the flip-side, Charlotte only hears growls. Recognizing the daughter’s gesture brings the point home, but it could have been more compelling. The rest of the movie falls victim to the A24 effect, where a filmmaker connects the entire plot to generational trauma. If that’s your jam, there’s plenty of blatantly obvious symbolism you can connect to the DSM-V.
I can forgive all of the above, but I cannot ignore the most obvious omission: wolf man never howls at a full moon. We get a few indoor howls but they sound more like the result of AI audio-mixing like respeecher … a bit worrisome given the recent news about The Brutalist. I even caught a hint of Hungarian mixed in.
AI Digression
And, boy oh boy, bad timing for Brady Corbet’s The Brutalist. Not only did AI alter the Hungarian dialogue, but it also cobbled together the pics of Laszlo’s buildings used at the exhibition. I’m not suggesting AI ruined the movie, but it takes away from Corbet’s accomplishments. Especially since he's acting like VistaVision is the second coming. Maybe its time to add asterisks next to the names of Oscar winners relying on AI.
Proponents for AI want you to believe its integration into our world is inevitable. Come on. That’s just how they get you. In nine months, AI has gone from including a couple surreal images in Late Night with the Devil to altering the dialogue of the Oscar frontrunner for Best Actor. The Brutalist’s editor defends it because its “nothing that hasn’t been done before.” Setting logic fallacies aside, this way of thinking is concerning. I’d reference the slippery slope, but Hollywood already hit the bottom.
You’re Cordially Invited
Amazon invited me to an advance screening of You’re Cordially Invited, the Will Ferrell and Reese Witherspoon comedy coming to Prime tomorrow. Writer and director Nicholas Stoller isn’t my cup of tea, but going felt like a middle-finger to Amazon and it’s anti-cinema policies. Unfortunately, the joke was on me. This one is a stinker.
The stars phoned this one in - I expect that from Will Ferrell, but Reese? Ever since Reese debuted Hello Sunshine, her projects have lowered in quality. Maybe Reese isn’t the best curator. And I had no idea Amazon adopted Netflix’s new policy to to make actors continuously repeat the plot. You’re Cordially Invited is a reminder that streamers hate us and think we’re dumb.
Back in Action
I will not besmirch the anticipated return of my first crush (it was that red dress in The Mask). Cameron is just getting her feet wet and her performance was fine. The problem here is Netflix’s casual viewing category. Netflix claims casual viewing is for people folding laundry, but they really just think we’re dumb. Back in Action is a movie made with that philosophy in mind. You can skip it.
Bystanders
Bystanders is technically a 2024 release but it just got a nationwide release last week. It’s also very low-budget, so it needs some amplification. Low-budget horror is a subgenre unto itself. But before venturing into this world, you need to alter your expectations a bit. Independent low-budget horror sheds starpower and inflated budgets for a great idea. The right ones blow you away and forever change your criteria for a “good film.” Most are the wrong ones, but that’s part of the fun.
We’ve seen some interesting takes on rape-revenge movies as of late. For example, Coralie Fargeat’s Revenge modernized the subgenre by retooling tired, old tropes geared more toward titillating audiences than empowering the character. Bystanders continues subverting those long-established expectations; one being the path to revenge. Here, the typically hapless, innocent bystanders are anything but. I’ll stop there. The less you know the better. You can only get this one on VOD from Dread Central, but I’m sure Shudder will pick it up soon.
Traumnovelle
I saw this January stinker during SLIFF last November, but it finally released in theaters this month. It’s wild that this movie is based off the same source material as Eyes Wide Shut. Obviously the general narrative is the same, but that’s about it for similarities.
I couldn’t relate or even care about the couple in Traumnovelle. They were cold and lifeless. Also - I remember thinking Eyes Wide Shut needed remote-controlled vibrators and I’m glad someone finally listened.
Love Me
Love Me is an experimental film starring Steve Yeun and Kristen Stewart in a love story about a satellite and ocean buoy. It sounds awesome on paper, but the end result was a mess. There’s even an extended scene inside the metaverse (add puke emoji here). Another stinker you can skip.
Conclusion
Things will heat back up now that Dump Month closes in 24 hours. But if you need something good to watch tonight, go to a movie theater to see Nickel Boys. I can’t believe this isn’t talked about more for best picture. I thought about comparing the Nickel Boys POV shots with the Wolf Man POV shots but it felt like I was disrespecting Nickel Boys.
Another good one - Simon, King of the Witches (1971), has nothing to do with Dump Month, but I saw it last night and loved. It’s more a character study of a modern day warlock and his aquaintances. Very weird, very 70s. You’ll love it.
Great overview of some of the mehs in dumb month lol did you end up watching Presence? Also I’m watching Simon, King of Warlocks tonight. Love the premise!